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小白兔的微信红包扫雷群二维码

趣聊2019-08-08 32 人围观
简介01小姨子问我:兔子为什么不吃窝边草?我说:兔子是觉得太近了吧!小姨子笑了:可草不这么想,谁吃还不是...
01 小姨子问我:兔子为什么不吃窝边草? 我说:兔子是觉得太近了吧! 小姨子笑了:可草不这么想,谁吃还不是吃,还不如让脸熟的吃,你说是吧,姐夫? 02 有一天,一只青蛙亲了兔子一口撒腿就跑,兔子紧追,青蛙情急之下跳进了池塘,不一会儿,一只癞蛤蟆爬了出来,兔子大笑:哈哈,过敏了吧! 03 老虎抓到一只兔子,正准备开吃,兔子叫了起来:大王您不能吃我! 老虎笑了:请适度解释下。 兔子:您吃了我将失信于兽,因为您提倡和谐丛林。 老虎:我们用的字典不同,我的字典里,和谐是指我吃你的时,你必须情绪稳定。 04 赛跑之后,兔子和乌龟相爱了。一段幸福的时光后,兔子不安地发现乌龟似乎病了,却总是被乌龟一句”没事儿”敷衍。 终有一天,兔子醒来发现乌龟身体冰冷,心跳脉搏低到没有,天崩地裂般的绝望让他几近昏厥,他死命摇晃乌龟。 正巧老鼠经过,闲闲地问了一句——你不知道乌龟是要冬眠的么? 05 小兔子咬牙切齿地诅咒狼,小鸟听见了,就告诉了狼。 狼说:“唉,我就是嘴对小兔子厉害一点,其实心对小兔子比豆腐还要软。” 06 老虎:医生说我营养不良,唉!我看你也不能解决问题,烦埃 兔子:是啊大王,我还不够塞你的牙缝呢,不过有两样东西你吃一定有效。 老虎:什么东西? 兔子:每天吃一只狼和一只狈。 老虎:管用吗? 兔子:管用,都说它们是“黄金搭档”。 07 兔子总是隔三岔五地用头去撞树桩,撞得头破血流,这让邻居野牛叔叔感到十分纳闷。 野牛:“小子,炒股票把脑子炒傻了吧!怎么老是拿头去撞树桩呢?” 兔子:“你懂啥,这叫与‘桩’共舞! ” 08 一个人到山区旅行,他看中了山中猎户家中的一顶兔皮帽子,对猎户说:“这顶帽子我很喜欢,不知兔皮是否怕水? 猎户说:“当然不怕,你什么时候见过兔子打桑”

微信红包扫雷群二维码 My sister-in-law asked me: why doesn't the rabbit eat the nest grass? I said: the rabbit thinks it's too close! Sister-in-law smiled: but grass does not think so, who eats not to eat, it is better to let the face cooked to eat, you say, brother-in-law? One day, a frog kissed the rabbit and ran away. The rabbit chased it. The frog jumped into the pond in a hurry. After a while, a toad crawled out. The rabbit laughed: , I'm allergic! The tiger caught a rabbit and was about to eat when the rabbit cried, "King, you can't eat me!" The tiger smiled: please explain moderately. Rabbit: if you eat, I will break my promise to the beast, because you advocate harmonious jungle. Tiger: we use different dictionaries. In my dictionary, harmony means that when I eat you, you must be emotionally stable. After the race, the hare and the tortoise fell in love. After a happy time, the hare uneasily found that the tortoise seemed ill, but he was always perfunctory by the tortoise. One day, the hare woke up to find that the tortoise was cold, his heartbeat was low, his despair nearly fainted, and he shook the tortoise to the death. Just as the mouse passed by, he asked leisurely-didn't you know that the tortoise was going to hibernate? 05 the little rabbit gnashed his teeth and cursed the wolf, and the bird heard it and told the wolf. The wolf said, "well, I'm just a little tough on the bunny. In fact, the heart is softer to the bunny than tofu." 06 Tiger: the doctor said I was malnourished, alas! I don't think you can solve the problem either. Rabbit: yes, my lord, I'm not enough to plug your teeth, but there are two things you can eat that must be effective. Tiger: what is it? Rabbit: eat a wolf and a mess every day. Tiger: does it work? Rabbit: it works. They say they're "golden partners". The rabbit always bumped his head against the stump and broke his head, which made Uncle Buffalo, his neighbor, very surprised. Bison: "Boy, stock speculation makes your brain stupid!" Why do you always hit your head against the stump? " Rabbit: "you know what, it's called dancing with the pile!" "08 when a man traveled to the mountains, he took a fancy to a rabbit skin hat in the hunter's house in the mountains and said to the hunter," I like this hat very much. I wonder if rabbit skin is afraid of water. "of course not," said Orion. "when have you ever seen a rabbit beat mulberry?"

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